categorization

I like to sift and sort. I like to analyze. I over-think, therefore I am.  

Back in high school, I think we all put labels on ourselves in a desperate attempt to keep life (and it's characters) simplified. At that time, you were how you dressed. The music you listened to and the group of other similarly attired people you associated with, defined your status. While we neatly packaged everyone else in those labeled boxes we lamented being placed in them ourselves. How angsty and rebellious of us.....  

It disrupted our world view when the boy in the "hero" costume (Thank you Disney marketing for defining heroes and villains for us all) turned out to be bad or the girl who looked the most G rated ended up being the one who was the most wild. In our young orderly brains, those exceptions to the "rules" were met with shock and surprise.  Our parents, who had been the authorities on rules and morals and everything in between became fallible human beings.  This discovery added to the sense of confusion and general "world crashing all around us" angst.

College was a much freer experience. No longer trapped by the labels and the clear cut sense of black and white, the world took on several shades of grey. With that revelation, the categorization became far more complicated. But the urge to categorize persisted. We grouped ourselves by age, (21 being a good line to draw),  major,  and personal interests. 

I've come back to this draft a few times. I never have time to finish it.  I've put a lot of thought into how I tend to group people. How I try to make sense of the world around me. There's been loads of analysis dedicated to the lines I draw. I've lost count of how many times I've erased those lines and started over. (mentally and literally in typing this out) Rather than continue to explain that process here, I'll let you think on your own categorization strategies in the past.  See? You know what I'm talking about. You've been there and done that... or perhaps are still in the process of doing it.

At some point I gave up. I couldn't make sense of everything and everyone.  It was overwhelming. (I tend to be overwhelmed a lot here, right?!) One day, as I was driving... and I'm ALWAYS driving... I had an epiphany. I was reflecting on all of the people I know and their mid life meltdowns. People can be grouped into 2 big categories after all....  There are people who have standards/principles/values that increase, or become refined, over time. They expect more out of themselves and others and cling to that criteria. And there's the converse: There are people who grow more lapse in their standards. They choose to let things slide.   

How we get into either of the 2 groups--the journey that leads us there-- can  be very different. Our starting points can be different... but that fork in the road that we take is a very definite turning point in the entire outcome of our lives ever after. And often it affects everyone around us as well.